That time I was picked to test a bolster beanbag pattern

A few weeks ago there was a sewing pattern tester call (this is when pattern companies want to release a sewing pattern they’re designing but it needs to be tested first…get rid of all the gremlins etc. & they select a few various sewing people’s with varying degrees of sewingness). I applied because how difficult could it be, then held my breath as I’d never been picked before, then let my breath out as I can’t hold it forever without turning blue & passing out (doesn’t sound very appealing).

Dundun daaaaah! Cue dramatic music as yay, I had the major honor of being selected *happy dance*. And now begins the process of being a tester (it’s all very technicial). The following is based on true events…

Accept invitation to tester group. Faff for a few days. Go onto group & see some people have already completed theirs (who are these non-procrastinator people?). Locate instructions & download, yadayadayada, speed through instructions, select necessary pattern pieces to print. Have message pop up that the printer is offline (it’s frikkin not, I turned it on). Moan to husbander because he’s probably the only person who would care. Troubleshoot printer. Printer now printing. Mentally high five yourself. Line up pages & then go wondering around the house looking for the tape dispenser, whilst starting to feel annoyed because you know you’ve seen it somewhere. Find dispenser. Tape pages together & cut out the shapes you need. Go delving into the deep, dark crevices of your fabric until you locate ones that look big enough for said project. Take all items to the lounge.

Start laying out the fabric. Curse fabric when it doesn’t want to fold neatly. Squint eyes at pattern pieces, line up fabric, pin & cut. Curse fabric again because you should have cut out the larger pattern piece first, but oh well you can still make it work (brain tired). Finally cut out other pattern piece & make a note to get zips at the place that sells zips on the way home. Get out potential stuffing from the cupboard & leave to get the short people.

Collect short people & take them with to the zip selling shop, locate zips whilst short people think this is an amazing shop to play hide & go seek in (more like hide & wait for mommy to freak out because she can’t see them. Thankfully Chaos will let out a little shriek now & then & because mommy has ninja keen hearing she can pin point location to within a few cm’s). Leave shop. Do mommy & short people things & breathe a happy sigh when checking in on the tester group that the final date has been extended, because you have also since realized that you will need to make 2 of these tester bean bags otherwise there will be short people anarchy & the world as we know it will be destroyed (or just my house). Weekend has commenced so not much more can be done except making sure that all remaining pieces for BOTH bolster beanbags has been cut out.

Friend comes over on the Wednesday to work & to make sure you stop procrastinating (domestic goddess duties took first place the previous days, I swear). Spend morning pinning zips, squinting at instructions, talking out loud as that might help my brain decipher instructions, humming along to music & stuffing up zip on first bean bag. Decide that nobody has time for unpicking & so try again on second beanbag because you’re 96% sure you’ve got it figured out. Enjoy the sweet smell of success (was probably just my tea) & start attaching other pieces. You & your friend congratulate each other on the work you both accomplished & once again it’s time to collect the short people.

In the last few days leading up to the deadline it’s a blur of unpicking, acquiring stuffing, finish sewing, finally adding the stuffing within the inside cover & a sigh of relief is heard throughout the land as I get to stand back & admire my creations (it’s alive, it’s ali…no not really). Take photos, submit, done…and now I can finally share the end result.

I have since learnt that once a procrastinator always a procrastinator. Sewing requires copious amounts of tea. Zips ain’t that bad. And the toddler size beanbag makes an awesome cushion for series/movie binging.

Happy sewing!